Your first attempt at make up. Not bad, if you're going for the battered and bruised look. This is definitely a look we'll keep in doors, so that nobody jumps to conclusions and we get a visit from child protective services. Maybe this is a sign I need to break away from the neutral eyeshadow shades and go for some obvious make up colors like blue and green...
This is what happens when someone sneaks into the closet when we're not paying pattention. You get into your dad's stuff and lose your pants apparently.